Mother Teresa

There is a new book coming out about Mother Teresa. Come Be My Light: The Private Writings of the "Saint of Calcutta" is its name. It sounds like a book I would like to have.

Probably none of us guessed that this nun, tiny as she was, projecting a heart and a will as fierce as a lioness defending her cubs, was inwardly as weak and doubting as the rest of us can be. I certainly had no suspicion of it. Does it affect my opinion of Mother Teresa? In a way, yes, it does. It strengthens it.

Because I am a contemplative and interested in mysticism, I have read about some of the historical saints. In fact, most of their lives were tough. There was a lot of suffering going on - physical illnesses, spiritually dark periods, difficulties in their monastic houses or with church authorities, you name it. It isn't easy to be a saint.

Mother Teresa has really earned the right to be named with these others. Not only her through work, or her strength of will, but her strength of faith. Yes, strength of faith. You can't serve the way she did, with all the doubt and suffering she experienced, unless there is a bedrock of faith supporting the whole structure.

Apparently she had, when she was younger, some experience of contact with God, and then somehow lost that sense of contact. And never experienced it again. No wonder she had doubts! To have that, and watch it slip from you, and there is nothing you can do about it - that would hurt, big time. I can't imagine a worse hurt than that.

But in spite of all that, she went on, dedicating herself to work that she felt called to do, teaching us by her words and example, and that takes a degree of strength that most of us can only aspire to.

I used to respect Mother Teresa. Now I admire her.

I used to think she was a tower of strength. Now I know she was.

I used to think she was settled in a powerful faith. Now I know she had doubts and questions like I do.

We need heroes of our faith. We need examples of devotion and service. We need them from past centuries, and we need them from our own time as well. Mother Teresa is such a figure, and her humanity cannot stand in her way.